Till My Last Breath
by AlwaysRise
Summary: "This is the final boarding call for passengers of flight 372A to New York"
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: My best friend is the one who got the idea for this story. He will be my co-author. I hope you all like it.**

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**Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own Castle.**

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_"This is the final boarding call for passengers of flight 372A to New York"_

On a busy airport, there's someone sitting in a black jacket and blue jeans with her head held in her hands. Her presence there is just physical. She isn't aware of what's happening around her because her mind is wandering somewhere else. Sitting there for past 2 hours, she has lost all the contact with the outside world . It's just her and her thoughts, no one else. She was there at this airport 5 years ago, at same chair and in same position, coming after breaking someone's heart who loved her like nobody ever did. And she loved him too. More than he knows. She avoided going back there in last 5 years, making every excuse possible, just to avoid seeing him again with all his hopes twinkling high in his eyes, waiting for the day when the love of his life whom he loved more than he ever loved anyone else will say yes. But now she is out of excuses and even at the last moment desperately thinking of a new one. When suddenly…..

_Airport Employee: Is this Ms. Beckett?_

_Kate: Yes. What can I do for you?_

_Employee: We have been waiting for you from last 10 minutes, the flight is about to leave. You coming aboard?_

_Kate: Oh, I am sorry. Coming right behind you._

…

She is sitting there in the plane wondering about how people with react, seeing her after 5 years. (Yes, she left New York and came to D.C 5 years ago.) They might hate her for missing the wedding of her two best friends, Esposito and Lanie, who took their vows 2 years ago . She also avoided going to New York to see her another best friend Ryan's baby girl whom he named Johanna. It was Kate's farewell gift from Ryan, naming his daughter after her mother. But she has only seen the baby girl through the photos which Ryan had e-mailed her .She was excited to see her though. Maybe the only person in New York who won't judge her.

She can't stop thinking about how things have changed in last 5 years, two of her friends are married now, another is busy with his family and last but definitely not the least the rich and famous ruggedly handsome writer Richard Castle, the love of her life, her one and done, who was tagging along her in NYPD, solving cases, is now a "_famous politician"._

**- Sal**

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**Judge away?**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Guys sorry for the late update. Here's the 2nd chapter. Hope you enjoy. Reviews are welcomed. **

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All this thought process was going in her mind during a short journey from Washington to New York. She wanted this journey to continue forever and was hoping to never land in New York.

She noticed a lady sitting beside her is continuously staring her face and was thinking something, she ignored it for first 5 minutes but now Kate was getting uncomfortable as the constant staring was getting creepy.

Kate: Do we know each other?

Lady: Sorry to ask but are you the one who lead the force that rescued weapons from some militants last week

Kate: Yes, it was me only

Lady: I knew it was you, I saw you on news…Thank you so much for doing that, because of people like you people like us can sleep at night peacefully

Kate: Pleasure is all mine (In an attempt to avoid further chit chat)

…

This was one of the eight big missions she handled during five years she served. She has won so many awards and medals in these 5 years for her work and is tipped for heading for Federal Task Force. But the question arises "Are all these medals, awards, interviews worth it ?" This question brought up a memory of 5 years ago, and she remembers it as if it happened yesterday.

5 years ago when she was about to leave

Ryan: Beckett, have you thought through it? I think you are taking a wrong decision

Kate: I know what I am doing.

Espo: You shouldn't go, but if that's what you want then you have my back.

The talk with boys made her think more and she remembered the words of her friend Royce.

"Putting a job ahead of your heart is a mistake. Risking our hearts is why we are alive. The last thing you want to do is look back on your life and wonder..if only."

Was she really taking a wrong decision? What does all the success mean when you don't have anyone to share it with? But this was the position with a federal task force. How could she miss such an huge opportunity? She had no choice than to choose between her job and Castle. She was in such a position where she had to sacrifice one or the other. And it wasn't easy for her.

...

How will they look at her now, have they forgiven her for what she said? But suddenly she realizes today is not about any one of them, today is about Rick becoming a mayor and his happiness is everything that matters right now.

...

Castle entered politics four and a half years ago, when Kate said NO to his proposal and left for D.C .He lost all his will to write any more novels as a part of him died that day and that part was the writer in him. He concluded Nicky Heat series by killing Rook and not Nikki because he thought it's better to kill him in novel and just end the whole series.

Initially when he entered politics, it was just to help his mayor friend before elections. But slowly he was involved more and more with all the campaigning and meetings. He was enjoying this role in his life but not as much as he loved solving cases with his favorite detective.

...

Three years ago Castle had to go for a meeting with the mayor, he was late as Alexis was sick. He stayed home for his daughter. Castle already missed spending time with his little girl when she went to the college and he wasn't going to leave her alone for a meeting when she was home for a small break. After few hours he receive news that there was a bomb blast where meeting was to be held and nobody came out alive from that building including his mayor friend. After that it was decided by party that he is the right person to do that job one day as he is a known figure among the crowd, and can make people believe what he says. That day started a new chapter in his life, chapter which had no connection with his previous life. He had two divorces before that but that didn't affect as much as one failed marriage proposal did. He is completely altered man now, but for his family and friends he was just the same old Rick Castle.

...

Kate arrives at New York airport and takes her luggage. It contained small gifts for everybody her former colleagues and friends, Martha, Alexis , her dad and for Castle. As she went out there was a driver waiting for her with a board in his hand reading "FOR Kate" . She realized that saying 10 times "Don't send a car" to Castle was in vain as he did what he wanted to as always. There was a small smile on her face as she sat in the car and relaxed. She started reading the newspaper lying in the backseat of the car. Front page still had the news of mission which she carried out few weeks ago and as she was turning pages, she found some homicide crime news. She took more interest in reading news about small homicide crimes than front page missions. Her detective mind started to think who the killer is while reading the news, and her guess was wrong. The killer was not the guy she thought but she wasn't convinced and then she thought to herself that it's none of her business now and cops on case should have known more about the case than her 5 minute knowledge. Castle was the one who built up his crazy theories which actually helped solving cases. He thought outside the box. But Castle was there in NYPD just because of her. She left, and so did he.

Her mind was arguing with herself. With a constant battle between the Detective Beckett and the new Agent Beckett she didn't know when she fell asleep in her ride back to her friends.

-** Sal**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Was too late for the last update so to make up here's another chapter. Read, review and enjoy! **

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She arrives at Lanie and Espo's place. She was about to step out of the car and was too excited to meet her friends but at the back of her mind she was thinking would it be awkward after 5 years? She hadn't even been there for their weeding. Kate decided to meet everybody at tonight's party and not now . She asked the driver to turn the car and take her to the hotel.

She reaches to her hotel room. After putting her bags at side she just sinks down on bed thinking how many things she has to do before the party starts in the evening. Take a nap, take a bath, decide what to wear, get dressed, put make up on, call a cab. But this all was the easy part, the harder part was to meet everybody there. One hour later she was sitting in a bath tub with a glass of red wine and deciding between red dress and black dress.

_"Black dress is more apt for this situation, but isn't it too revealing to wear on your ex boyfriend's party", _she said to herself.

_" But red one is casual and it's not something to wear in Mayor's party"_

And after 30 minutes of debating with herself, she finally chose black one. She checked her cell phone, and she had to reach party hall in 2 hours. So after half an hour of relaxing bath she got out of bathtub and started to get ready for the party and informed at the hotel reception to call a cab.

90 minutes later, she found herself standing next to cab which will take her to party. Her mind started thinking about everything that happened. Right from her mother's murder, her first day with Castle at work, getting shot, realizing her love for Castle and arriving at his doorstep fully drenched in rain, making love to Castle and about the failed marriage proposal and going to DC. The car suddenly halts and she realizes that she has arrived at the venue. She closes her eyes, takes a deep breath and gets down from the car and enters the party hall.

Her heartbeats were fast, legs were trembling and she had a worried fake smile on her face. She noticed there were all the big names of New York city under the one roof and then there was the media. But till now Castle and her friends were nowhere to be seen and suddenly she heard someone calling her name from back.

_Jim: So you made it?_

_Kate: How can I say no to a party for such a big occasion?_

_Jim: No I thought just that you are busy now a days. (seeing a worried look on her face) But just so you know, I am so proud of what you are doing and making a name for yourself. You met your friends?_

_Kate: No I didn't find them._

_Jim: They are there(pointing towards them) .Go catch up, I will meet you later._

Taking small steps Kate finally went up to them.

_"Hey everybody"_

she says in a nervous tone and everybody turned towards the voice. She was surprised to see pregnant Lanie, Ryan with his daughter, and Espo... well at least he was looking just the same. All of them are so glad to see her and hugs her. They ask about her work and new life and she was glad to see nobody complained about her not coming to NY in last 5 years but are so so happy to see her now.

it was then she realized that she missed them and she needs them in her life. She was slowly getting comfortable after 20 minutes of initial chit chat and thought she was worrying for nothing. But she suddenly realized that she still has to meet Castle. She was getting restless that why nobody has mentioned Castle yet? And he is also nowhere to be seen . After every 5 minutes a new topic started, about her work, her life, their life but nobody mentioned Castle and obviously Kate being Kate, she couldn't ask them about him. But she was being curious, where is he? She was unable to control anymore and asked in a very normal tone trying not to act anxious.

_"So where is the host?"_

_"He will be there in few minutes, you don't expect Mayor to come on time, do you?"_ replied Ryan.

Suddenly there were noises and all the rushing towards entry gate to congratulate Castle who arrives with his daughter and mother. Slowly people were moving away after wishing him and then Kate went to congratulate him with everyone else.

She went near him and noticed a woman with her whom she has never seen before. She also notice Rick looked different. He had grown a stubble, his hair was neat and shorter, and he had lost some weight with addition of a few wrinkles on his face.

He was looking like a busy guy who doesn't give too much time to manage his personal looks. Weird thing was that she was finding him sexier in this new look. She remembers the stubble look he had on the very first day she met him. Keeping aside all these thoughts, she goes towards him to congratulate.

_Kate: (After an pause) Hello Martha and Alexis! And congratulations Rick._

_Rick: Glad you could make it._

_Kate: How can I miss the party of you becoming Mayor._

_Rick: Thanks and I read about your missions in newspapers, congrats. Enjoy the party and make yourself comfortable (and he leaves)_

Kate was actually surprised by his normal behavior, even more normal than her own. But she started talking to her friends later and realized that Castle isn't much in touch with either one of them too. Maybe because they remind him of her or maybe because he is busy.

Kate came to know that girl with Castle is "just" his office staff. She helps him with all the work and meetings so there was no need for her to worry. Not like they are still together. She realizes that she was "just his colleague" too, and he felt for her, but now she has no control over his life and there is no point in being jealous now. Suddenly someone announced, and a big applause follows…

_"Few words from Mayor himself"_

Rick starts speaking after clearing his throat,

_"Thank you everyone for being there, it is so nice to see you all here. I will keep my speech simple and short. This starts the new phase of my life, the phase I didn't dream of while growing up and the phase which is completely unrelated to my past life. People often ask me, How did I end up in politics? It all started at my dear friend's funeral, whom I miss so much. That funeral made me realize what I want to do with my life, maybe being writer was not enough anymore, I wanted to do something different. It's not like I didn't like being a writer, I loved being a writer, it made me famous and rich and made me loved by so many people. But it was time for a new challenge and I took that up. Always remember that you can do anything when you want, it's never too late to start a new part of your life, so NEVER STOP BELIEVING, and do what you want when you want, never wait for a right time, life could end in seconds, there is no time better than Right Now. So do something that will make a difference in other's lives..Thank you all. Enjoy the party"_

**- Sal**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: So guys what do you think? Are you liking the way story is moving ahead? Read and review. **

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Castle's speech got a huge applause and everyone just can't stop praising. This speech had everything in it. It was enthusiastic, encouraging, simple and a true. Of course you can see the writer side of him from this speech. Kate, Ryan, Espo and Lanie were all happy for their friend too.

But Kate knew Castle too well, maybe even more than everybody present in that party hall. She was wondering, there was a 5 min long Castle speech without any joke and that was strange because Castle was always like a 9-year-old on sugar rush. Then she told herself that he is a Mayor now, and maybe that's why no jokes but a serious person. She consoled herself that Castle hasn't changed and is still the same old guy whom she fell in love with.

At the end of the party it was Lanie to ask Kate,

_"Hey girl so when can we expect you for a night out? And I won't take NO as an answer."_

_ "I'll be there tomorrow night Lanie, keep your wedding album ready. And Ryan..I want to see all Johanna's photographs too..right from the start. " _

_"Right on boss. Me and Espo have even taken a day off tomorrow. Just in case. After all you are here after 5 years. Don't want to miss out on the fun."_ replied Ryan.

Everyone says their goodbyes after deciding they will meet after exact 24 hours with some drinks and laughter.

While in a taxi back to her hotel Kate thought she was worrying for nothing. Everybody was normal and nobody blamed her for anything. Due to fear of awkwardness she avoided meeting her friends for the last one year and now she was regretting it. She missed all of them so much.

She reached her hotel and went straight into her room. After a long tiring day she changed into her T-shirt and shorts and switched on the television for some entertainment. There wasn't anything interesting on the TV either so she switched it off. Her mind wandered and she started thinking about that woman with Castle again. Now she felt like having some wine before sleeping so she called the reception, but nobody picked up. She decided to go herself so she changed quickly into more acceptable clothes to roam in a hotel and as soon as she stepped out of room, she saw Castle there with his colleague.

_Kate: Castle?_

_Castle: Oh, hey. What are you doing here?_

_Kate: I am living here in room no. 447 for next 3 days. What about you?_

_Castle: It's just a place to have our meetings and by the way she is Rosy._

_Kate: Hi Rosy, pleasure to meet you._

_Rosy: Same here. Our room is right next to yours._

_Kate: (in a confused tone) So you two have your meeting and it was a great party Castle._

_Castle: Catch you later. Good night._

Kate came back to her room forgetting about wine thinking why of all the hotels in this city, he came in here? And did he really come for a meeting or are they? Is he just following her? But she didn't tell anybody that she is staying here so it must be just a coincidence. She didn't realize when she fell asleep thinking about off of it.

After 2 hours in the middle of night she was woken by some weird noises. After paying attention she realized that those were the sex noises coming from the room adjacent . She blamed thin hotel walls and after a minute realizes that Rosy said their room was near hers. She just kept laying there on the bed and a tear escaped from her eye thinking that maybe Castle has found someone. She thought why was she crying? She has no right to do that after rejecting his proposal but still it was wrong of him to do so in next room when he knows that I am here. She realizes all this thinking is in vain and Castle isn't hers. He can do whatever he wants.

The next morning she wakes up and opens the door of her room to ask for newspaper, when she sees a guy coming out of next room and she's confused what on earth was going on last night? Suddenly she hears Rosy saying hi to her and she's back to her senses. Rosy introduces her to Frank, her boyfriend. Kate meets Frank and after basic chitchat asks where was Castle?

_"He left just an hour last night after the meeting was over. Frank was here in New York and was staying in here so he invited me over."_

Kate comes back to her room after talking to them. For some reason she was relieved and feeling like dancing that it wasn't Castle yesterday night, it was Frank and Rosy! She said to herself_, "I know my Rick"_ and then she thought did I just say _"My Rick"_ …. He is not mine, he is just Rick, she explained to herself. Kate sat on the bed smiling to herself, a smile after realizing that MAYBE he still loves her the way _she still loves him_.

**- Sal**


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